ANGER; ITS EFFECT IN THE SOCIETY AND HOW TO MANAGE IT

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ANGER; ITS EFFECT IN THE SOCIETY AND HOW TO MANAGE IT
ANGER; ITS EFFECT IN THE SOCIETY AND HOW TO MANAGE IT

What is Anger?

One can say that anger is a natural, though sometimes unwanted or irrational emotion that everybody experiences from time to time. Experts on anger have described the emotion as a primary and natural emotion which has evolved as a way of surviving and protecting oneself from what is considered wrongdoing. One of the major causes of anger in our society today is irritation. One can easily get irritated in our basic human needs (food, sex, shelter, etc), if these are not met, one is more likely to feel irritated which brings about mild anger. Reacting to frustration and criticism or threat can also bring about anger and this is not necessarily a bad or inappropriate reaction. We can feel irritated also by people’s beliefs, actions, and opinions; hence, anger can affect our ability to communicate effectively.

Anger can also be a ‘secondary emotion’ to feeling sad, threatened, lonely or frightened. It is useful to try to understand why one or somebody else is feeling angry at any given time so that the root causes can be addressed and problems solved. Anger is not just a state of mind, it can be triggered by physical challenges such as an increased heart rate, food pressure and levels of hormones, such as adrenaline preparing us physically for ‘fight or flight’, due to these physical effects, long term anger can be determined to be bad for the health and well being of a person.

 

EXPRESSIONS OF ANGER.

Anger can be expressed in many ways; different types of anger affect people differently and can manifest to produce different actions and signs of anger. The most common signs of anger are both verbal and non-verbal. Biblically, anger led mosses to hit the rock twice while God instructed him to hit it one, as a result, he didn’t enter the Promised Land, and it also led Cain to kill his brother Abel (jealousy as a resort to anger). One can be clear that someone is angry by what they say or reaction to something and by the tone of the voice. Anger can be expressed through body languages, staring, frowning, and clenching of fists. Some people are good at internalizing anger and it may be difficult to notice any physical signs. It is, however, unusual for an actual physical attack to transpire without the signs appearing first. Just like the saying ‘laughter is contagious’, the same holds for other emotions. Your anger can affect not only you but people in your life as well. It casts a negative feeling on those around you.

THE MAJOR TYPES OF ANGER.

We have three major types of anger which have been recognized by psychologists:

  • SETTLED AND DELIBERATE ANGER: is a reaction to perceived deliberate harm or unfair treatments by others. This form of anger is episodic. It is sometimes referred to as “MOTIVATIONAL ANGER”. It is often used by managers, both in the workplace and more common in sports. The idea is that when your ‘team’ sees how angry you are; they will be motivated to improve their performance. It can also be used as a ploy to control subordinates and it doesn’t usually last long. This has a major issue which is that/ you have to keep pulling the stunt, eventually your subordinates begin to see through it and fail to respond; unless you escalate matters.

 

  • DISPOSITIONAL ANGER: is related more to character traits than to instincts or cognitions. Sullenness, irritability and churlishness are examples of the last form of anger. This is related to behavioural anger. People who experience behavioural anger usually confront whatever is making them angry, which is usually people around. It doesn’t really matter if the other person is genuinely doing something wrong or; the angry person is just in a bad mood or interpreting everything in the most negative way imaginable. This brings out a key understanding when dealing with anger; it is not about what other people do or behaviour which makes you angry, but it is the interpretation and subsequent reaction to their behaviour which is the cause of the anger/

 

  • HASTY AND SUDDEN ANGER: is connected to the impulse of self-preservation. It is shared by humans and animals, and occurs when the animal is tormented or trapped. This form of anger is episodic.

 

We also have other types of anger:

  • PARANOID ANGER; is a type of anger that is total without cause. It is due to low esteem, the person imagines that someone is against him and resorts to anger and violence to lash back at their imagined attacker. This is a result of assumption, the angry person has interpreted the words or action of somebody else as an attack and a slight on them.
  • PASSIVE ANGER: these people typically use sarcasm and mockery as a way of expressing their anger and stay away from conflicts and confrontations. It is referred to commonly as “PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIOUR”, and it seems to have become more and more common in recent years. When one is angry at someone else and refuses to come out and say it, instead, they adopt a hostile attitude to that person through a range of measures.

 

  • RETALIATORY ANGER: the most common type of anger which occurs as a direct response to someone else lashing out at you or doing something that makes you angry. Rather than resolving the issue amicably, you deem it necessary to even the score. This results to violence.

 

  • SELF-INFLICTED ANGER: people use this as a medium to punish oneself for something they did wrong or perceive they have done wrong.

 

  • VERBAL ANGER: this type of anger is expressed verbally not physically. They will think that resolving to violence might actually hurt them, so they resolve in calling names and abusive responses. Sadly, this is one of the biggest lies ever told, as a verbal attack may not leave any physical scars, but emotionally, the pain can be overwhelming’

 

  • VOLATILE ANGER: when something is volatile, it’s explosive. Anger is the same way. This type of anger can erupt out of nowhere and can be extremely violent. It comes and goes without any warning. It can’t be predicted as it doesn’t need a reason to occur.

 

  • OVERWHELMING ANGER: these people tend to have real difficulty in expressing their anger and concerns and instead, they bottle it up. They are so wrapped up in their anger that they often result in the destruction or physical violence, causing harm to them or someone else.

 

  • JUDGEMENTAL ANGER: people who experience this type of anger often have low self-esteem. They express their anger by putting other people down in public in an effort to try to make themselves look better.

 

  • CONSTRUCTIVE ANGER: This is often the result of anger management techniques; these people channel their anger in a constructive manner to get a desirable result. Anger is not always a bad thing, like emotions, it exists for a positive reason.

 

  • CHRONIC ANGER: these people who experience chronic anger are the people who hate the world, they hate everyone in the world including themselves and they can’t tell why. One can’t wait for them to be angry, you just start out angry because you are assured they will be angry always at any given time.
ANGER; ITS EFFECT IN THE SOCIETY AND HOW TO MANAGE IT
ANGER; ITS EFFECT IN THE SOCIETY AND HOW TO MANAGE IT

COMMON TRIGGERS TO ANGER.

We have some common anger triggers, this leads to people getting angry easily;

  • Rudeness, poor interpersonal skills and poor service
  • Grief or sadness, loss of a family member, friend or other loved ones.
  • Tiredness.
  • Sexual frustration.
  • Hunger.
  • Financial problems and stress associated with debt.
  • Feeling of failure or disappointment.
  • Being physically or mentally unwell.

ANGER MANAGEMENT TIPS.

The tips below can help in the effective management of anger;

  • Think before you speak: what you say can determine what happens next. A verbal attack may not leave any physical scars, but emotionally, the pain can be overwhelming.
  • Once you are calm, express your anger; don’t lash out immediately you are angry to avoid regret and consequences.
  • Get some exercise.
  • Take a timeout.
  • Identify possible solutions.
  • Stick with “I” statements.
  • Don’t hold a grudge.
  • Use humour to release tension.

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